Hhrrmm … what sport displays the most underwear? Only two really come to mind – soccer and
rugby.
I don’t know if it’s a soccer “thing,” but there have
definitely been some sightings of briefs on the field. The rule of thumb seems to be, "Boys, wear something underneath your shorts in case we win." (Seems like every soccer player is dropping
trou as a celebratory salute in order to show off what he’s sporting.) I found another blog that has a multitude of these shots
and it’s updated frequently – www.undiesboyssoccer.blogspot.com. I’m never surprised by what I find there –
underwear, Speedos, UnderArmour, the works.
And it’s organized by name, by nationality, by underwear type, etc., so
you can’t go wrong.
I also can’t help but be put off a little bit by soccer
players. All of our kids who have played
have made it a point not to wear a jock or any protection (although one did
wear compression shorts), preferring to protect their teeth and their goods
from penalty kicks with their hands.
Seems a bit short-sighted, if you ask me, and although rarer, I’ve also
seen the same thing in televised games.
Therefore, I would have to say that soccer would be a close second, but
only because there’s a lot less physical contact.
The draw
to rugby? Those guys can’t keep their hands off one another, and it’s part of the game. What better way to bond with your mates and get all of the free visual exams you want? Play rugby, and don't wear underwear.
Ruggers have this tendency. Consider yourself lucky if you
happen to be watching a professional scrum and the guys are wearing compression
shorts or underwear, because usually they aren’t. I’m more surprised by the number of who don’t
even wear a jock, much like their compatriots on the soccer field.
Of course, in rugby, you’re more likely to lose a tooth than a testicle,
but it still isn’t good wear and tear on your junk not to have some
protection. Can’t tell you how many
photos or shots (or games I've watched) in which I’ve seen shorts coming off or being pulled up too far, and exposing
some fine rugger buttock. But then again,
these guys don't care; they self-profess to be half-screwy anyway.
I think it can be said and inferred, in fairness, that rugby
is probably the "gayest" sport ever, and I don’t mean that to be derogatory. It’s a hard sport that demands hard play, and
those guys have more moxie than most of us.
It’s a gay-friendly sport, if one cares to learn the rules and actually
follow the match. (I heartily recommend Rugby for Dummies. It explains everything in clear layman’s
language.) If not, all you have to do is
simply look at the buff guys and enjoy yourself without worrying about the
outcome of the game. If there’s no rugby
where you live, there's the Internet, or you can check the ESPN schedule. YouTube is filled with rugby mishaps that
involve numerous wardrobe malfunctions.
I can’t speak for all locations, of course, but most big cities have a
rugby league … you just have to know where to look.
(So, just to be clear, explain this to me: soccer players can do a victory lap or be carried off the field on their teammates' shoulders in a pair of sweaty, dirty skivvies and ruggers literally get their
shorts ripped off, felt up, and flash everyone in the stadium ... and nobody blinks an eye as it’s part of the
game and gets people to laugh and cheer for their home team. But Janet Jackson flashes her breast - accidentally? - and people become rabid, start foaming at the mouth and the American government goes ape-s*** over a "waldrobe malfunction." Doesn't sound quite even or fair to me ... not that I'm complaining. I'd much rather a view a pair of sweat-stained undershorts on a really buff guy or get a gratuitous butt shot any day, but how exactly does that work?)
I have to choose,
To set my claim;
Is soccer or rugby
The gayest game?
So many players,
So much to share.
Who doesn't like an athlete
In his underwear?
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